I have a wonderful morning ritual that I’ve spoken of many times. It’s not only the most important way to start my day, but it’s the part of my day I look forward to the most. It’s a time of prayer, contemplation, spiritual readying, journaling and meditation. But sometimes even with every good intention I get distracted. Maybe it’s by what’s going on in my life. Maybe it’s what’s going on in someone else’s life. I become discouraged because I think I know enough to be able to center myself and get back on track. The one thing that I haven’t quite mastered is meditation, yet that is the one thing I know I need to practice the most. It quiets my mind, brings me back into the moment, and allows me to see things clearing and more simplistic. So today that’s what I did and when it was time to open my eyes the first thing I saw was the word “love” written in big read letters on my door of art where I tape the pictures my grandkids draw for me. All their pictures are about love, maybe that’s why we’re called to be more like the little children. They remind us how easy it is. If life is lived in and through love then how can we go wrong throughout our day in all we do. How can we not find comfort in the love that’s all around us. All we have to is open our eyes for as Gandhi said, “Where there is love there is life.”
In dormancy of winter we are like the seed have a time for deep thought and contemplation as we await a new awakening that comes in the spring of our life. We encapsulate all that we’ve learned and gained throughout our lifetime thus far. There is a sense of comfort staying safe within the bounders of our shell, but the spirit within longs to be free to experience more, and grow into the beautiful creation it was created to be.
In the process of new awakening we tend to forget where we’ve been and what we’ve learned thus far. Where we are heading becomes our focus and our senses go into high gear as we begin our journey toward new growth. We drink in the waters and feed off of the earth, and begin to feel an inner warmth that connects material life with the spiritual, pulling us instinctively upward. When we finally burst through the earth and the sun kisses our cheeks we know that which we were seeking was seeking us as well all along. It is in the spring of my new life I feel that warmth of love surround me, I in It, and It in me. Oh, if only I could remain in the warmth of light all the days of my life, but there’s much more life to see, lessons to learn, and growing to do along my journey as the spring of life begins anew…right here where I stand…right now.
Boy, I don’t have to try to think. I think too much as it is. Even as a kid I was a deep thinker always living inside my head. I remember sitting in the backseat of our car looking out the window at everything yet not really seeing anything. I would hum as I was deep in thought. Maybe I did it to drown out the chatter of my siblings. I remember my Dad asking me, “what’s ya humming back there Connie?”
“Oh nothing,” I’d say. Because if I stopped to think what I was actually humming I’d lose my train of thought.
“Well, it sounds nice,” he’d say back to me.
I took the Myers Briggs personality test once and mine came back as an INFP introverted, intuitive, feeling, perceiving personality. *INFPs never seem to lose their wonder. One might say they see things through rose colored glasses.
I have come a bit out of my shell these days, finding the need and nerve to actually say what’s on my mind. All those years of deep thinking I’ve become like an over inflated ballon letting the air out slowly. Finding a happy medium is what I have to work on. That is because if I’m thinking all the time, then I’m not living my life, and if I’m talking too much, I’m not listening to others.
As Seng-Ts’an says, “Stop talking, stop thinking, and there is nothing you will not understand.”
*based on Carl Jung and Isabel Briggs Myers personality type theory.
Ah…September, I love this time of year. Yet for me so many sad and unkind things happened, but I hold no grudges or animosity. For all I’ve experienced in these autumn months have taught me many lessons about how precious life is, and it still holds within it the birthday celebration of our first born. I love the pungent smell of leaves and earth mixed together. Then there are the apples and pumpkins, spices of cinnamon, cloves, and ginger. The last hurrah of the flowers as they give us their most vibrant display of colors before the winter months set in. Warm evenings beside the fireplace, and lots of snuggling with Tom and Ollie. Yes, if I allowed myself to be caught up in the grief of my past, and for those I’ve lost, I’d only be compounding my sorry by not seeing what this wonderful season has to offer.