These special days of remembrance for the people we have loved in our life can be so bittersweet. There are those who have gone before us that we wish we could hug one more time. Yet when we could have done so, did we make the time?I have this very old newspaper clipping found in the keepsakes of a loved one who passed away. It was a letter to Ann Landers column for Mother’s Day. The same thought can be applied to our Fathers as well. It’s Called:
“Let me know it while I’m living”
Dear Ann Landers:
I had a marvelous mother who loved me, sacrificed for me, and helped me in every way possible. All my years of growing up through college and eventually marriage, my mother was at my side. When I needed help with my little ones, she was there for me.
Today, we buried that wonderful woman. Can you imagine how I felt when I returned from the service and found this poem in her desk drawer?
“The Time is Now”
If you are ever going to love me,
Love me now, while I can know
The sweet and tender feelings
Which from true affection flow.
Love me now
While I am living,
Do not wait until I’m gone
And than have it chiseled in marble,
Sweet words on an ice-cold stone.
If you have tender thoughts of me,
Please tell me now.
If you wait until I am sleeping,
Never to awaken,
There will be death between us,
And I won’t hear you then.
So, if you love me, even a little bit,
Let me know it while I am living
So I can treasure it now.
Now she is gone and I am sick with guilt because I never told her what she meant to me. Worse yet, I didn’t treat her as she deserved to be treated. I found time for everyone and anything, but I never made time for her. It would have been so easy to drop in for a cup of tea and a hug, but my friends came first. Would any of them done for me what my mother did? I know the answer.
When I called Mom on the phone, I was always in a hurry. I feel ashamed when I think of the times I cut her off. I remember, too, the times I could have included her and didn’t.
The world is filled with sons and daughters like me. I hope they see themselves in this column and profit from it. It’s too late for me, and I am sick with regrets.
-Guilty and Heartbroken
I can’t imagine that my own loved one felt any lack of love from those of us that indeed loved her. Maybe though it was never said. Maybe it was always assumed that she knew. But it goes to show that even the most loved people need to feel back what we hold for them in our hearts. Love is not simple a word, our actions always speck louder than words.